Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Vapor Lock

Swim Day

1 x 150- Warm-up
4 x 200- 3:00
2 x 250- 4:00
5 x 100- 1:30
1 x 100- Cool down

total- 2050yds

Full disclosure: I had a 1 x 500 planned in there too for after the 250s but before the 100s. I couldn't do it. I don't know what my problem has been but its reached the point where now I'm overthinking it and its blowing me out of the water. I was really tired this morning, talked myself in to getting up and getting to the pool. Talked my self up about how hard I was going to push this workout and how hardcore I was going to get on it. Then...fizzle. I can't figure it out. I'm trying to relax and let the speed come the way it does. I'm trying to get jacked and amp it out. Blah all the way. If it wasn't so close to race time I'd take a day off. I need to fight through this shit. I made all five of the 100s and was able to work those pretty good. Its frustrating because this has been the easy part the whole time, the part I'm good at already. I'm sure that mindset is part of it. After I take a week or so off post-race, once I'm getting back in the water, I'll start shopping around for a friend to swim with. I bet that would help. Time off will help too. Tired right now. Meeting after school. Must prevent my soul from being sucked from my body.
I want you to look at the above paragraph. I wrote that this morning after my swim while I was waiting for my students to get to school. Now look back at yesterday's post. I used the word "meh" to describe my workout three times.
Something is wrong.
So I'm deciding to take the advice I offer for myself above. I need a mental health day. I'm worn the fuck out and need to step back. I know the race is three weeks away. But what that really means about today and tomorrow's workouts are that I won't be gaining a ton by doing them or losing a ton by skipping. I might actually gain by skipping and letting my body recover. I think it was a mistake not to take it easy for a few days after my last race, not to dial some of the workouts back last week. That would have helped me recover. It would have been smart. But now I'm here, where I just feel tired, unmotivated, and unexcited about getting my shoes on for a run.
The biggest argument for this, as far as I'm concerned, happened today while I was teaching. We were in the middle of math and I completely vapor locked. As in, "Ok, now we are going to move on to number...uh...what number are we...here, you guys just get back to work and finish the page. I'm going to go sit at my desk for a few minutes." I blanked. The lesson we were doing disappeared off my screen. This almost never happens to me while I'm teaching. But I was feeling it today and it just got the best of me. So I'm taking my own advice, as well as the advice of Sister Dirtbag, Official Trainer of Team Dirtbag, and taking the day off. Possibly tomorrow too, we'll see how I feel. Because there's a difference between fighting through that shit and just throwing a nothing, weak workout on top of an exhausted body and mind.
So I'm going to space out on the couch, probably throw around a few Portals, and go to bed early. And I'm not going to feel guilty about it because sometimes not pushing through is the best thing to do.

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