The Flat Wasn't Mine! (and THE AVENGERS!!!)

Bike
time- 3:00
distance- 34mi

First of all- This

What Awesome looks like

The Avengers came out Thursday at midnight. So, ok, it came out Friday. And I am a GIGANTIC nerd. As such, I jumped at the news that a local theater would be showing all the Marvel movies, save the Incredible Hulk, back-to-back as a run up to the midnight showing of The Avengers. For $35 I could not pass this up. So I left work at lunch (it was a meeting day for my grade level, I didn't bail on my kids) and hit the theater. Iron Man started at 2:15pm. Iron Man 2, Thor, Captain American happened. For my money, Cap is the best story of the series so far. And then the Movie You've Been Waiting For Since 2006- The Avengers! Amazing. So good, so much fun, everyone should go see it. It is everything wrong with Micheal Bay movies done right by the only man in Hollywood who could pull it off- Joss Whedon. I don't want to go on and on about it, but it kicks all the ass I hoped it would and then some. When you go, as you should, stay all the way until the credits completely finish. The final thing isn't a tease for a new movie, its just good fun. Trust Dirtbag.
Avengers got out at 2:45am.
So I started sitting in a theater at 2:15pm, and left at 2:45am. This is not the best way to train for anything except life-long virginity. I was freaking wiped. But I'm hardcore and I taught the next day on three hours sleep. Then spent Friday and Saturday catching up. It seems I am getting too mature (not old) to do a giant movie marathon like that and then be fine the next day. So Nick Fury ruined my Saturday run. And he kind of messed up my Sunday ride.
I didn't run on Saturday. I thought about it. I felt guilty that I didn't. I nearly pulled my shoes on once or twice. But then I would collapse back onto the couch and fall asleep again. I suck at running last week.
I did ride. Diesel wanted an early start, 6:30, and while that sounded like boiled suck I went along. Better to ride in a group, makes the miles go by faster and it helps push. Normally.
We got the base of Pupukea with me in the lead, which is always strange. Diesel was talking about how strongly I was riding right off the bat. Taking three days to rest probably played into that. But there was also another issue impacting his speed. His back tire was slowly flattening out. Right after the first big haripin he noticed the softness in his rear (tire).* So he stopped to deal with it and I went on. He'd change it and catch me before I reached the top anyway.
Somewhere along the way my energy level went from decent to basement and by the end of the climb I wanted nothing more than to go home. I felt awful, kind of sick, weird, off. I waited at the top for a minute or two and when Diesel didn't show I headed back down the hill, planning on passing him and letting him know I was going home. Never passed him. He was still at the bottom cursing at himself. Turns out he overinflated his spare tube when changing the tire, a rookie mistake he spent the next fifteen minutes kicking himself over. Personally, I was just glad it wasn't me with the flat for once. But because of the rims on his bike my spare tube was useless and he was SOL. We managed to get his tire reinflated enough to get us to Waimea Bay, where we parked and called the Grey, who had decided to sleep in, for a pick up. It was nice to chill at the beach and hang out for the thirty or so minutes it took the Grey to get to us. I could have bailed and finished my ride but I decided to hang because that sucks to just leave someone behind like that. This ain't Top Gear.
After the pick up I decided to short my ride and head home rather than get the extra mileage. I don't know why I was so out of it but I was, so I only did a little over 30 miles. Not good, especially with no run, but you know what? The Marvel Movie Marathon with geeky friends was completely worth it. No doubt.
And now for a bunch of pictures I took while at the theater. Yes, I dressed up like Batman. Why? Because Batman is a DC superhero and DC is the biggest competitor of Marvel and I wanted to try and pick a nerd-fight. Because it is fun to troll nerds.

Batman Vs Iron Man

Batman vs Cap

Batman lectures the God of Thunder

Batman helps Hulk with a smasher

Batman and Ethnically Diverse BatGirl

*Ok, that joke made me laugh in my head like this, "He he he he he."

I Will Not Yell At My Bike...

Swim
1 x 200- Warm-up
5 x 100- 1, 2, 3, Swim
5 x 200- 100-5, 7, 9/100- long
3 x 50- Sideline kick
1 x 100- Cool down
total- 2050yd

Ride
time- XX
distance- 9ish mi FLAT!!!

Swim was positive, I think my swims are going to be coming around finally. It wasn't awesome, but for a drill-focus day it wasn't bad. Low heart rate, low DSQ even during the 5, 7, 9 set. I like using that set as an indicator for anaerobic fitness. When I can push the 100 and maintain the 5, 7, 9 rhythm without wanting to die I know I'm doing well. Was nearly there yesterday.
My ride was one of those frustrating ones. There were a few factors going in.
1) I haven't had a good, 9 workout week yet in this training cycle. It's nobody's fault, but its not making me pleased. I wanted this week to start off right so I could get all my workouts in.
2) Weather. It was raining on and off all afternoon by my house and I knew that I'd get a little wet in the first ten miles, but after that the sky looked clear-ish.
And then I flatted nine miles in. With GatorSkins! I saw and heard it happen. Saw the patch and thought, "Crap, I bet there's something in there," but couldn't avoid it without becoming a lycra hood ornament. Then I heard the noise, but maintained hope. Maybe, just maybe I was wrong. I'm ok. The bike seems-no, no it doesn't. Back tire is tracking wrong. Damnit.
So I pulled across the street into the parking lot of a driving range and set about looking for the culprit. I found a most tiny shard of glass which I picked out, but when I investigated the inner side of the tube I felt no holes, no punctures, no flat-making anything. Musta got it. Threw in a new tube, cracked the CO2, checked it, and was ready to go. I admit, when I checked it I did think, briefly, that the tire didn't seem quite as full as it had a few seconds previous. Whatever, it's just me being pessimistic.
OR...
You want to know what's better than getting a flat tire in scattered showers? Getting one, fixing it, then having the new tube immediately go flat. I had two spares in my bike bag, so I was ready for this, but it still ruined my ride. The plan was to ride all the way into town to meet Super Awesome Wife. But two flats means I add at least 20 minutes to my ride time. A ride time that dances right on the edge of finishing as darkness falls (Why does darkness always fall? Is it because it can't see the steps?) when all goes well. Two flats means I'll be finishing well into No Cars Can See Dirtbag Bikers time, which isn't safe and doesn't make for happy biking. So I texted Super Awesome Wife for a pick-up, fixed my flat*, and waited. One person did stop and offer me help, which I thought was very nice.
*"Fixed my flat" should be read "took the tire off and the tube out and ran my fingers along the inner and outer edges of the tire shouting at nothing, 'There is no puncture! There is no problem here! Why did you go flat!? I spent $45 on you so you wouldn't do this!' and then, feeling nothing amiss, decided to see if I could waste another tube by trying again."**
**As of this morning this tube still has all the air in it, of course. Must have been a pinch flat. Though there are two tiny divots in my tire, but neither show through to the inside.
Possible Bright Side: The drive into town revealed my weather predicting abilities to be right in line with my football predicting abilities. Which is to say, really really bad. I'm pretty sure I would have been rained on with little-to-moderate intensity for 75% of my ride. So there's that then.

Oh, Holey Ride... (OR Mom, He's Poking Me!)

Aborted Ride Day
Run Day
time- 57:33
distance- 6.1mi

It was going to be a good ride. The weather sucked at home so Sean and I decided to meet down at the airfield for some repeats or, better yet, some good distance. Or, as it turned out, stopping twice because my front tire was allergic to air. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, the Time of the Flats continues. Yesterday was a double rear tire flat ruining my ride. Today that stayed nice and tight but my front tire attracted the glass slivers. If you click on the charts on the link you can see where it happened. I think my favorite pieces of information are the little heart rate spikes while I'm not moving. Know what those are? Those are, "Get on the rim you little...." or, "I know there is glass in here somewhere! Here it is! Of course, too tiny and dug in for my chewed down nails to reach. I shall now dig a hole in my tire!" And once the integrity of the rubber is compromised, fuggetabotit. Now every tiny little suggestion of debris is going to cause Massive Catastrophic Damage to the tube. You know what the most annoying part is? Yesterday, when I went to The Bike Factory to grab some new tubes and CO2 I looked at GatorSkin tires. But at $45 each I passed. Don't need 'em yet, I thought. Sucker. Guess what I'll be buying later today?
Sean was very helpful during the first flat, giving me pointers on the best way to seat the tube and tire, helping check for glass, and talking me through using the CO2 cartridge the first time. Thou Shalt Not Explode the Tube. But after the second flat, wherein I found not one but two shards of glass in different places, I decided to call it a day. And Sean decided to point and laugh at me. And video tape me. And take pictures. Because he's a good friend and that's pretty much what I would have done had our positions been reversed.

Little bastard

Letting Diesel Dirtbag know he is Numero Uno! 

Sean let me borrow his patch kit and I patched up the tire and we rode back to the cars. He decided to keep riding, which turned out to be a mistake because Puncturana, the Goddess of Tire Integrity, got his ass too. But she got him via a bee sting. Sean's allergic to bees. Benadryl to the rescue!
I needed to workout when I got home so off went the bike gear, on went the Bikilas and running shorts, Rush into the headphones, and we're off. Nice and easy run. The weather was mostly cool, which was nice because I left my water at home. Foot got a little sore near the end of the run, not really sure what that's about. Probably just that a lot of my recent runs have been on trails to pounding the pavement wore on after a while.

*Grumble*

Today was supposed to be a ride day. Actually, yesterday was supposed to be a ride day. But it was pouring. Not according to weather.com, which said it was bright and sunny, but according to window.com, which said it was not a good day to go outside. And rather than hit the trainer I decided to take the day and ride Sunday.
Fail. Looked nice enough this morning when I got up. Sprinkles started but I figured it wasn't that bad and it always rains near my house. I wanted at least 50 miles today. Got down to the main road and got a good look at the north horizon. Them there be rain clouds. Damnit.
New plan! Head home, set up the trainer, watch the Packers, and ride. Or I could immediately get a flat rear tire. Choice- call Super Awesome Wife for a pick-up a mile and a half from the house or use this as an opportunity to practice changing a tire on the road. Practice! I'm not great at changing my tubes yet and on a race day I don't want to be stuck and screwed. And it wasn't raining. Ok, so it was, but not much. At that moment. Oh wait, now it is. And now it stopped. But now it is. You get the idea. Got the wheel off, got the tire off, got the tube out, new tube lined up, tucked in, seated, tire back on, inflate (after a little fighting with the stem), small happy dance, wheel back on the bike...and tire goes flat again. Anyone want to guess what step I missed? Yes, the tall, balding man in the back? That's right, I forgot to check the tire for the cause of the original flat. Which means whatever evil little pointy messed up my first tube just messed up my second (and only spare). Gold star for you. Which led to this:

Pictured: Dirtbag Tantrum

There may have been some cursing of the Cycling Gods (Feltus, Cervellonon, and Tebow, among others). There may also have been some stomping of feet and shaking of mini-bike pump.

As penance for my mistake I shlepped the bike home on my shoulders, as rolling it a mile and a half on the rim seemed ill-advised. And now it sits in the corner waiting for me to fix it again, but I'm not willing to look at it quite yet. Luckily, it didn't rain at all the whole walk back. Oh wait...

It's At Home?!? D'oh!

Ride Day

time- 56min
distance- 20mi

The ride started out so nicely. I felt like I was banging along, holding a good pace and feeling stronger than I had felt up to this point on the bike since we got back. Part of that, I think was my seat adjustment. I've been slowly raising my seat by a few inches, trying to get myself into the proper position for effective aero-ing and pedaling. I think I'm at the sweet spot, or very nearly there. Might need to move the seat forward a teensy bit. And yes, in cycling a teensy bit is the correct terminology for measurement as far as you know.I'll check out one of my many books and get back to it.
Anyway, things were going swell. (How often do you get to use "swell"?)
Until I nearly killed an old woman. I swear it wasn't my fault. We have bus stops here that flirt with being off the road, but aren't really. Which means that when handsome young man on bicycle and big ass bus come to occupy the same spot at the same time, handsome young man needs to choose to go around to the outside and in to traffic, or inside and thread the needle. I went inside because there was, well, traffic. And in my path, not standing in the boarding line, was an old woman. Now, when I say she was in the middle of the open space I don't mean middle-ish. I don't mean middle-like. I don't mean near-middle. I mean she was in the exact center of the open space, as if if was an assignment. As if someone had told her to stand there and she came early, brought with her a map, yardstick, a chalk liner, maybe a GPS, possibly a star chart, and a graphing calculator and determined the exact center of that space of road. And she wasn't moving. The only other possible explanation for her total lack of reaction as I zipped by her was that she was actually a mannequin left on the side of the road after the failed escape of a poorly-planned mannequin heist. I imagine it went something like this:
"All right, we'll take the bus to Sears, run in, grab the mannequin, and be out before anyone notices us."
"Will they let us bring the mannequin back on the bus with us, boss?"
"Sure, why wouldn't they?"
Some time later: "Hey there now, you can't bring that mannequin on the bus!"
"Noooooo! Foiled again! Leave it! Just leave it. Here come the Five-Oh! Drive, damnit, drive!"
"Fare, pleaase."
"Arrrrg!"
That's really the only two options.
The ride recovered after that near-hit (a "near miss" is a hit) for about five miles. Then, POP hissssssssssssssssssss! I made have let loose a few choice words which would call for a penalty if said during a race. No worries, though. I'll just pull over, pull the spare tube and flat kit out of my seat bag and oh yeah I left my seat bag in the living room after adjusting my seat. Cue more choice penalty words. How frustrating. So I called Super Awesome Wife and she came to the rescue with my truck. A good ride spoiled by lack of preparation.
And finally,
Good news, everyone! Yesterday I registered for my first century ride, the Honolulu Century. I've been planning on getting in on this for a while now and finally heard back from the HBL about my membership information and got in on the ride. There are plenty of distance options: 20 miles, 50 miles, 75 miles, or the full 100. Well here at Dirtbag Fitness do not do things part way. Of course I signed up for the full century. My training has already begun. The hardest part will be not jacking distances too quickly. I have seven weeks and am at 35 miles right now. I want to be at at least 85 before I attempt the full on September 25th. Just adding 10-15% every long ride out. And its not the distance that has me worried. Its working out my nutrition plan and practicing that. I'll have to do some research. I have no time or average speed expectations. I just want to be out with a bunch of other cyclists in a non-competition event and enjoy being on the bike in Hawaii. Looking forward to it. Much thanks to my Dirtbag Sponsor, Background Profiles, for helping make participation in all these events possible.
Oh yeah, and I'll keep a spare with me now.

Fixing Flats & Running Naked

*Fair Warning: This is long because we are covering two eventful workouts in one blog*

Bike Day

time- 36 minutes
distance- 11.45mi

Today I went in a new direction. You see, this was my last ride on Sandra B., the bike Obi Tri Kenobi lent me oh so many months ago. So I headed left when I normally veer right. This takes me through Wahiawa and down Kam highway. I've never gone this way before. Call it an experiment ride to see how far/long it is to the gym. If it seems easy enough then I will consider taking my talents to 24 Hour Fitness on the bike for swim days sometimes. And it seems easy enough. The gym is only five miles from home, if that, and aside from a smallish climb its an easy ride. The only thing preventing me from riding to swim days now is fear of disappearing bike.
I went straight past the gym and down where I would run early in my tri training all the way to where the road ends at a nice little cul de sac community I could never afford to live in. So I turned around came headed home thinking about how slow I felt and how I need to build a bunch of base miles before I start my next training cycle and wondering how I'm going to do that will all the traveling we have coming up.
Next thing I know the front tire is going woosha woosha wobble and I'm realizing that after many month of riding I finally got a flat. And on a day when I need to be home soon so we can head to the beach for my birthday bbq (Happy birthday to Dirtbag in three days!). So I call in the Dirtbag Pit Crew (aka Stitches aka Team Dirtbag Sexy Wife, Nutritionist, Cheer Team, and Team Photographer) to come get me. I fiddle with the tire on the sidewalk for a while but I've never done this before and I've only seen it done once so I'm not trying all that hard. Plus not only is the front flat but so is the back. WTF, road? W.T.F. Soon Sexy Wife picks me up and home we go.
Later, being of the YouTube generation, I use the internets to find some very helpful videos of people changing a tire, study them, rewatch them, take copious notes, and then fake my way through both. I had a little trouble with the first, I don't think it was seated properly, but got it on. So now I know how to change a flat in a blazing fast really slow but I could get it done. I'm glad it didn't happen during either race. That would have ruined my day.

Run Day

time- 30.40 minutes
distance- 3.31mi

This was an experimental run day. I ran naked.
Not completely naked, obviously. Society isn't ready for that. Plus I might trip myself (hahahahha, get it? hahahahahooooo...anyway).
I've been doing quite a but of reading about barefoot running and I've written about it in this space a few times. Well, being between races and training cycles and building base miles right now I decided now was a good time to give it a go. I tucked my VFFs into my shorts, flexed my bare feet, and set off.
Ouch, ouchie, ooo, ow. The road is literally covered in little sharp rocks. Its practically paved with them! And those bastards kind of hurt. So my feet got tender quickly. But I had decided before I left that I would give it an honest effort for ten minutes and then I would put on my shoes. Those ten minutes went fast, and some of the time was very pleasant. Barefoot running on grass or on a smooth piece of concrete is a new and connecting experience. Your body feeds back to you all the information you miss out on in big Nikes or even my barely there VFFs. My form tightened up and my stride became what I ask it to become when I normally run. Its impossible to over-run or over stride barefoot. Your body won't let you. It hurts too much. I spent some time running along the white line on the side of the road to keep off the sharpest of the sharp and developed an eye for planning ahead.
At the ten minute mark (ok, at 11.40, I was trying to get to the end of the road) I stopped and put on my shoes to finish the run. If there's one thing I've learned from going minimalist its everything in small steps. Do little for a while, let the body adjust and strengthen, then do a little more. Rush it and you'll get hurt. So I stuck to a short time bare.
Putting on the VFFs felt great! My form, which I loved barefoot, stayed strong. I got my cadence up to a good aerobic pace and tried to put in a solid 20 minutes, which I think I did. It took me eleven and a half minutes to get to the end of the road and when I'm running normally it takes about nine, and I made that time up over the rest of the run.
If I've learned anything from the Mythbusters beside, "If it doesn't work, add more explosives," its that one result does not equal a sample size. This will not be my last barefoot run. I think I'll do somewhere between five and ten before I make up my mind about it one way or another. Right now I'm working on a nice blister at the tip of one toe and my soles feel tenderized but those should both work themselves out as my feet get used to this new punishment. We shall see where this takes your favorite Dirtbag.